Finally, the Art School of your dreams! The second run of Pretend Art School was six weeks long, January-February 2022.

If you want to read about the original iteration, there are a bunch of posts from my newsletter in October 2021, and here is the original web page.

Pretend Art School is a performance art piece that’s like a combination of a collaborative storytelling game, an improvisational theatre piece, and a bunch of scruffy kids playing pretend in the courtyard.

There were two ways to play. For posterity, I’ve kept the ads pretty much as is, so they all read as if the events are in the future. Alas, they are not.

Drop-in track

This is for the casual participant. Every Wednesday, 7:30-9:00pm eastern, I am hosting a Pretend Art School event.

Tickets are $10 for each event, or $5 for paying subscribers to my newsletter (upgrade your subscription here).

January 19, New Student Orientation

I’ve been to more than my fair share of student orientations. (University student for 12 years, and then a professor for 12…) So trust me when I say that Pretend Art School Orientation is the Orientation of my dreams. My goal is to replace boring with intriguing and predictable with unpredictable. You’ll pretend to be a student or professor at the school, meet your fellow students, and get into unexpected adventures. I can’t say more because… it’s supposed to be unpredictable.

January 26, Dollhouse as Self Portrait class

This is your chance to drop in on a Pretend Art School class. Be a pretend student, or perhaps a pretend cultural commentator writing an article about how self-indulgent and pointless art schools are.

The class: Imagine yourself as a dollhouse, with as many rooms as you have personalities, decorated in all your different styles and for all your different preferences. In this hands-on class you’ll start to make a dollhouse self-portrait. No art materials necessary, but all art materials are welcome.

February 2, Pretend to be Marina Abramovic

I’ve often thought it was unfair that only one person gets to be Marina Abramovic. In this special event, we’ll pretend that the Pretend Art School is hosting Marina Abramovic to recreate some of her well known pieces. You can pretend to be Marina Abramovic, or you can pretend to meet Marina Abramovic. Depending on interest, we’ll recreate The Artist is Present and/or Lovers. Or, you can propose a favorite Abramovic piece to recreate, or invent your own Abramovic-style piece and pretend it’s authentic.

February 9, Pretend Art Show

Did you know there’s an art gallery on the campus of Pretend Art School? The gallery displays student work and hosts performances, open mics, artist talks… The first art show of 2022 is being held February 9! Come pretend to be a student artist, or a dealer, or a critic, or an influencer, or… whatever you like! There will be mini pretend activities like weird conversational performance art, art interpretation Mad Libs, and an auction.

Which brings me to…

Art Needed! The gallery is currently empty! Unless we fill it up, we’ll have the most boring pretend art show in history!

That’s where you come in. Would you like to be a pretend artist and submit your real art to the show? All you need to do is submit a photo or youtube link of the piece, the title, the pretend artist’s name, and a short fictional bio.

All artists will receive a discount code to get half off the ticket price for Pretend Art Show. Want to send art, but can’t attend the party? No problem! Your art is welcome anyway.

February 16, Sue Me! Defending Art in a Postliminal Age

Sue Me! is a required course at Pretend Art School. We live in a litigious age, and artists need to be prepared to defend their work from legal, political, or public opinion attacks. Drop in on this class where you will practice matching wits against hostile interrogators, talk show hosts, and social media trolls.

Pretend MFA track

Pretend MFA is for those who want to really go deep into the experience. You’ll attend all of the events I listed above, plus extra sessions where a core group of us will create a five-week story arc. This core group will meet for two extra hours per week, playing out a storyline that begins with our characters meeting at art school. The goal for the five weeks is that we bring each of our characters through an interesting and transformative experience.

Here’s my attempt at an illustration of how good it will feel to be part of Pretend MFA.

Pretend MFA will be kind of like a creative writing class, but we’re all co-writing the story, you’re only responsible for one character, and we’ll be pretending it out together instead of writing in words.

Pretend MFA will be kind of like we’re all in a TV series together, where I’m the director but I’m also an actor, and we’re all writers. Every week we write that week’s episode and then perform it.

My job, as director, is to manage the collective experience and to help each person develop a character and a story that feels transformative and shivery and fascinating to you. Possibly a bit scary, because I like going to my edges, so if you’re a good fit, you probably like that, too.

Participation in Pretend MFA is free, because you’ll be more like a performer than an audience member, and you’ll basically be putting yourself in my hands and helping me develop a process to use in the future. Because we’ll be working together so closely as a group, there is a selection process for Pretend MFA.

Application questions:

1. Is it aesthetically pleasing to you to join a project-in-progress, where you’ll collaboratively create with a dedicated group, under my leadership, with our only goal being that everyone feels delighted with what we make, and the only guarantee being that something unexpected will happen?

2. Are you available to attend sessions on Mondays 4-6pm eastern (1-3 pacific) and Wednesdays 7:30-9p eastern (4:30-6p pacific), from January 17 to February 16?

If you answered yes to both questions, and you’d like to be part of Pretend MFA or you’re at least curious to find out more, please email me and we’ll set up a time to talk!

Want to support the Pretend Art School mission?

Donate $1000 and we will name the Pretend Art School after you!
Donate $500 and we will name a pretend building after you!
Donate $250 and we will endow a professorship in your name!

Your donations are NOT tax-deductible, as the school is a pretend school.